My friend and I were on our way to a restaurant-bar in Pasadena.
In the car, I warned her, though. "Uh...I may introduce you as a recovering heroin addict."
She was silent for awhile. "What?"
"I may introduce you as a recovering heroin addict. I may say, 'This is my friend, Matilda. She's a recovering heroin addict,'" I told her. I tried being matter-of-fact about it, but she really wanted to force the issue.
"Why?" she asked.
"It's kind of funny."
"Heroin addiction?"
"Yeah, I guess it's not that funny. But it's kind of funny."
She looked contemplatively (I hate that word) out the window. "Are you going to let them know that I'm not a heroin addict?"
"Are you kidding? Then they'll think I'm a liar. Say one thing and then tell them another? That's not right," I told her. I felt like I was explaining simple, common etiquette.
"Why do you plan on doing this?" she asked me, this time with less hesitation. "I don't even know these people, and they're going to think I'm a heroin addict."
"I'll look like a strong, supportive friend," I told her.
"That's it? Just because your friends think I'm a heroin add-"
"Recovering heroin addict."
"Why do your friends think you'll look like a strong, supportive friend."
"Because I'm there for you as you go through this really rough time in your life as you try to quit heroin."
"But I don't use heroin."
"They don't know that."
"I don't have track marks."
"Tell them you shoot up between your toes."
"I'm not telling them that."
"Fine. Jesus. I'll do it myself, then."
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1 comment:
that poor girl .. you are a good friend.
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